There are no rainbow pooping Unicorns here. Move along, please.

“That Man: Peter Berlin” (2005) What I know: it’s a documentary about a homosexual German man who stars in two wildly popular (for the times) 1970’s movie house porns, pursues photography centered around him and his ginormous man root and John Waters is interview. I adore the sense and sensibility of John Waters. If I could, I would have a constant inner monologue/narration and John Waters would be the voice. I adore the man! Yet I find many of his movies daunting. Hmmm, stay tuned for further forays into my inner mental adventure with Mr. Waters and his cinema.

“The Big Sleep” (1946) I had to watch this movie for film class last Spring. While I am proud of William Faulkner because he made his home in Oxford, MS. The Dreamtime land of my adolence and cultivated a community love for eccentrics I have never known Faulkner to write comedies and yet I laughed my way through this farcical “drama”. Bewildering to me, I was almost always the only one to laugh during most of the film. I don’t know if everyone else was asleep in class (completely possible) but this movie was so melodramatic as to make the movie “Soap Dish” come off as a serious piece of the human experience, no offense to Whoopi Goldberg and Sally Field. This movie is hilarious as a parody of the film noir genre and an absolute drag as a crime drama. “The Fat Man”? Seriously? They had a character named “The Fat Man”!!! WTF?!?!

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I’ve started a new page called Toe Curling Movies. I’m going to be updating it as I find controversial/uber sexy movies to watch and then watch them to report back to you. Yes, popcorn and gummy bears will be involved.

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I’m watching (Tivo’d) “Indie Sex: Censored” from the IFC. Thank God for Tivo because I’m pausing to make a list of all the censored and banned films mentioned that look interesting.

“Sweet Sweetback’s Baadasssss Song” (1971) for instance. The nakedness looks delicious but I’ve got to find out what’s up with the title! A black man named Sweetback? Is this a gay or 70’s reference? I must know!

“Baby Doll” (1956) From what I gather about the movie it’s about a married couple with a unique arrangement. I think they married when she was 14 with the promise that he wouldn’t require sex from her until her 20^th birthday, which is now quickly approaching. This situation conflicts the viewer even more because the wife is very childlike in her behavior with thumb sucking, her choice of dress and I think sleeps in a bed made to look like a crib. Sounds like a controversial subject even for today’s audiences. I can’t wait to see it!

“Back to God’s Country” (1919) Oh those wily Canadians! But why the title? When did we leave God’s country? Eden? Texas? Is this a movie about Newfoundland? (I think only Newfies will get that joke

“Boys in the Band” (1970) I think 20something gay guys are my favorite guilty pleasure – possibly more so than even cake and ice cream. They are a delicious roiling sea of internal conflicts. They often sacrifice so much of their home life and upbringing to be themselves and enjoy what they have. It’s like having Miss Merry Sunshine attending your Long, Dark Teatime of the Soul, conflicted but enjoyable.

“Dr. Hardon’s Injections” (1934) Seriously!?!?! In the 30’s no less! Hmmm, I wonder if it contains depression era style depravity.

Oh

My

God!

While Googling this title I stumbled across this bio from The University of Amersterdam. No kidding. http://home.medewerker.uva.nl/a.p.hardon/

prof.dr.  A.P.  (Anita)  Hardon
Afdeling Sociologie en Antropologie

Anita Hardon (1961) graduated cum laude in Medical Biology at the Uni­versity of Amsterdam (1984), specializing in tropical hygiene, science dynamics and medical anthropology.

Yes, that’s correct. Her name is Anita Hardon. I wish Bart Simpson knew about Dr. Anita P. Hardon. Moe would never hear the end of it. All I want to know is, what does the middle initial “P” stand for? Panis? Gosh, I love the Dutch!

“Nashville” (1975) Country music and boobies? Sign me up!

“Barbarella” (1968) It has a machine that gives orgasms! A mad scientist thinks he can kill women by giving them orgasms until they die. Silly doctor, orgasms only make us stronger. Muhahahaha!

“Basic Instinct” (1992) I haven’t watched it but I am aware of a boiled rabbit and the struggle scenes that are real nail-bitters. I am already prejudiced, though because I think Michael Douglas deserves what ever torture his wife thinks up for putting her through such hell by picking such a whack job for a sex fling.

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Erran Baron Cohen Presents
Songs in the Key of Hanukkah
Dreidel (featuring Jules Brookes & Y-Love)
directed by Adam Ryzman

http://www.songsinthekeyofhanukkah.com

(c) 2008 New Line Records. A division of New Line Productions Inc.

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A shocked mother’s lament.

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Once upon a time, when I went to boarding school in Canada I was a member of the choir, briefly. One of our favorite warming up songs was called (I think) “The Coffee Song”. I cannot find any info on this song online but I still remember all the lyrics.

C-O-F-F-E-E
Don’t drink so much coffee
Not for children is this Turkish drink
Keeps you nervous, pale and out of sync
Don’t let caffeine stew make a robot out of you!

Maybe SiteMonkey can make a recording of this silly song and then you will quickly understand why it’s nearly impossible to ever forget it or how to spell coffee.

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The goal is to live a good life. To leave the world better than how you found it. To be a contributing member of society. To improve as much as possible spiritually during this all too brief lifetime.

I am not perfect. I cannot be perfect because I am human. I am a work in progress. Much life the Sistine Chapel, I imagine. I heard that when they do renovations on the Sistine it can take decades and even centuries. That’s me, a really long-term work in progress.

It’s very likely that it will take several lifetimes to get me in working order but unfortunately all I have is the one lifetime. And I haven’t exactly been doing a great job thus far. I’m definitely behind schedule. I thought that by the time I would be heading into my thirties I would have caught up and would no longer feel like I’m always behind the eight ball. I’ve named the eight ball Charlie. Charlie has been one of my most constant companions for my entire life. I keep expecting Charlie to start wiggling and roll over me to squash me flat but so far that hasn’t happened. I’ve been really close more than a few times.

It is important to be earnest. Honor those you interact with, even when you don’t care for them. There is something honorable about every person, sometimes that little glimmer of honorability is hidden deep, very deep within them. But even if you struggle to interact honorably go ahead and do so on the theory that there’s something honorable somewhere in there and that little glimmer is to what you are reacting.

Does that mean you should blindly trust everyone? Hell no! It’s difficult to explain and so much easier to understand when you see it demonstrated but it goes something like this. Even when you are faced with a rude, crude, criminal or belligerent person you should interact with them in a sensible (and probably guarded) manner but at the same time you can act honorably toward them without making yourself unduly vulnerable or foolish.

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